Dentophobia

Lots of people hate going to the dentist.


I fear going to the demonic office marked DDS.

Hey don't judge, it's real.

I fear it so much I will let the pain linger for months before making and breaking a appointment.

My brain says," Just go! The pain will stop and it's over with in short order."

My other brain says... "Fuck you, smart side of the brain"

So as a result, things get neglected. And there are consequences!

 

A couple teeth get pulled and I  freak out the Periodontist, as he works to save the rest of my teeth.

I may have cried, hyperventilated, and squirmed just a bit. 

 Lesson learned....

If a week of mashed potatoes and soup don't convince both sides of my brain, this will.

Even with insurance, the out of pocket the cost of this torture could have bought the following. 

A zippy death trap..  when you're smooshed on the road you don't care about your teeth.

A vacation on the beach! 

l

This house in Detroit.
I'm not making this up.  Detroit real estate is depressing. 

Fuel for the year.

Prettier than the crap in my mouth.

And a case or two of dental floss!

Out, damn'd spot! out, I say!

We all have our little stashes.

The kids don't need to know.

Trust me the kids do know.

Recently I discovered Chell has her own secret stash.

Not a back issues of Lesbian porn, or zip lock baggies full of pot.

It could be Oregano???  Not.

My girl has a soap addiction... 

Bars of soap stashed everywhere!

Here is some of the actual hoard.

 

If I lose her in the grocery market or Target, I head to the soap aisle.

I have had to resort to distracting her in the store...  there is enough soap in the house.

Move along! There is nothing to see here!

I will get worried if I start seeing these.

Old lady decorative soaps.

Not delicious.

Hello? Hello, Who's there?  Mr. Clean, is that you?

What! Wait a minute.. I might need some of this.

Who modeled for these Boobies soap on a rope?  

Everyone teases Chell for her clean obsession, but truth be known, she smells nice! 

There are far worse vices. 

Lather on Girl! 

Oscar's is not Wilde

Last night we thought we would be classy.
That was the plan anyway.
Chell's good friends are in town and we planned a dinner at a place that is totally Vegas.

Right on Freemont. The ex Mayor recently opened a restaurant.

Yikes he did not get to be Mayor because of his handsome mug.

Oscar Goodman was once a Mob lawyer. He embraces the Vegas lifestyle.. Women and booze in every photo-op.  He is not politically correct, which is not strange for a politician. He just doesn't hide it.

So when he retired as Mayor. (His wife was elected and is now our current Mayor.)

He opened Oscar's Beef, Booze, Broads.

Although it is pricey. It gets great reviews.

This is my review.

The second floor eatery is in the old smelly Plaza hotel.

Kinda smells like sever overflow.

The staff was nicely dressed, live piano music in the bar area.

The dining room is like stepping into 1958... and I am pretty sure the chandelier hasn't been cleaned since then..the fine color of decades of nicotine....  

Oh they re-used those light fixtures.

Lowe's should offer that color.. easy work for those renovating a smokers house.

The staff was friendly.. the guys pouring the water and clearing the tables a little too eager and rude.

The food wasn't that bad.. it just wasn't great.

I am from the school of if you pay between $25.00 and $40.00 for a entree. (No sides included) it better be phenomenal..  

I would expect with the reviews and the hype.. the meal would end like this.

But we didn't get sick... and we can now say that we have done it Oscars.... better yet we can offer our own review when people ask.  

Oh and be prepared if you pay with a card, they add the tip even if you leave that in cash... Bad business people. 

The night wasn't a total disappointment.. the real reason for adventuring out was to meet Chell's good friends and the company was not a let down... it did live live up to the hype!

Life isn't really about the piece of salmon on your plate.. it is about who is sitting next to and across from you!

It was a good night.

Today's weather is hot, record breaking hot if you can believe the TV.

But its Vegas and we are acclimated to this right?

The guys on the weather tell us to stay cool.
Drink lots of fluids and don't leave your pets out.

But they don't give you the obvious warnings, the ones that the less than brilliant fail to follow.




10 out of 10 doctors recommend that you use high SPF sun screen.

Someone tell this woman cooking oil is not a good substitute.

I know you want your kid to get a early start on the whole Toddlers and Tiaras craze.. and sure that semi-safe spray tan gets expensive.. 

But baking a baby in full sun is not going to get you on reality TV any quicker.. the local news  maybe.

Even Barbie needs to learn the heat and sun will damage that lily white skin plastic.

But Ken likes me tan and pretty!

Sure we all know not to leave our pets in the car when it's this hot.. But remember.......

Not to leave them in the fridge for too long either... 

Drinking lots of fluids does not include guzzling a 12 pack of Corona...

Not only does the alcohol dehydrate you...

Moments like this...

Quickly turn into this.

Because drinking buddies are not kind, and cant wait for you to pass out in the sun.

Up up and away...

This weekend I took a extra day off.
Friday was spent on the road.. the long, boring never ending road to Reno.
And when you do get to a town it looks like this..

At 25 mph

But being the good daughter that I am, I didn't mind helping Mom move some stuff to Reno. Helping out with the driving.. Knowing that I had secured a plane ticket for the ride home!

What airline is that?

I started looking for flights a week and a half before Memorial Day Weekend...  This can't be cheap!

Even Southwest was looking for almost $200.00 for a hour flight. 

A fare that can cost as little as $59.00 on a ordinary day.

So I do a Orbitz search and there is a flight on the day I want for $44.00. What? That can't be right.

I fast click the link.. flight has to be booking fast.

Nope the plane appeared pretty empty.

So I pick the best seat in the house. A little skeptical.. right up front!.

Guess what? That seat is $12.00!.  I un-click, a bit fascinated. and find that you can pre-book a seat For $5.00, $6.00, $10.00 or $12.00 bucks.

Otherwise you are on your own.

I chose a five dollar seat in the middle double row.

Now they ask if I am checking any bags?

50 bucks a bag???? I guess I can down size, I'm only taking two days worth of stuff.

No, I will just take a carry on.

10 dollars to take a carry on... a small duffle that I got free... (See previous post.)

After all was said and done, the flight was still a bargain at $62.00.

Yesterday I boarded that plane. That very small plane. The Grumpy staff  called us on board by how much you paid for your seat... Those rich folks getting on first.

I noted that the seats are smaller than usual.  The leg room was tight... for me.. I'm 5' 2". With a 28" inseam.

 

I really wasn't that uncomfortable, the seat next to me was empty and I just shoved my pocket book under that seat. (Usually there is plenty room for a bag and my gnome legs. )

Hey That aint nice.

Once we are air born I look for the button to recline my child sized seat... No button, no recline.

Oh well, it's only a hour flight.

Snack Time!

Every snack cost you.. and a soda or water is not free either... Should have smuggled in snacks.

Once we land... and I am not lying here.  We are asked, more like told to shut all the shades on the windows and turn on the vents....  This is because it's 90 degrees out and they don't like to run the A/C.. although I suspect they don't have any.

Thanks for flying with us! Sucka!

Would I fly with them again... Probably not.. Southwest offers the same flight, and I can bring a bag or check on in without extra fees... plus the staff is great and I like them. Planning ahead is the name of this game.

Allegiant you get a D.... 

Free is good

Last month the local casino had a promotion to get us fools with a few dollars in our pockets through the door.

So they say.  Mostly they love our $$$$$

Last month every Saturday Chell and I went to get our free Polo shirt, duffle bag.......

A bag that some fool is trying to sale on e-bay.

and a coin counter. (With a chance to win $$$$$$$.)

This is what a line to free money looks like.. But it moved fast..

When Mom got home from Reno she was obsessed with our coin counters... oh the jealousy.  

We had to hide them, in fear that she would become a thief.

After all, they are super fancy!

This month the Casino has a promotion where you can win all sorts of things Friday, Saturday and Sunday..

Free meals. A Vacation to Hawaii. Free Slot play. Puppies!!

What do you mean the puppies part was a lie?

One of the prizes is a mystery gift that you pick up and the rewards center.

Translation, you get some of the shit that we couldn't even give away last month.

Strangely Mom didn't feel like going to the Santa Fe yesterday and so I took her card and swiped it to 

see if she won anything good.

MYSTERY PRIZE!

A good daughter would have picked up her trinkets, but they are sticklers for ID's and stuff.

So I brought home her slip... 

She wasn't too excited, thinking it was another stupid t-shirt, until I told her I saw folks walking around with the coveted coin counter.!

And so we say goodbye as she headed out to find her treasure!

Guess what?

She got it!

Chell and I were so amused at how excited she was! I can only hope she was half that happy the day I was born.